Family Guide to Addiction

Signs to Pay Attention To

Specific behavioral and physical signs that often indicate substance use disorder: withdrawal from family and social relationships, unexplained financial stress, changes in sleep patterns, weight loss, new secretive behavior, paraphernalia in personal spaces, mood swings that don't fit the person's baseline, deteriorating work or school performance, lost interest in previously important activities. None of these alone is conclusive — but patterns matter. Trust your instincts if something feels off.

How to Have the Conversation

Choose a moment when the person is sober. Lead with concern, not blame. Use 'I' statements ('I'm worried about you,' not 'You have a problem'). Be specific about what you've observed (behavior, not character). Don't demand immediate action; offer options, including a placement advisor number they can call privately. Don't engage while they're intoxicated — wait until they're sober. Expect denial, defensiveness, or anger — these are normal first responses, not final answers.

Do You Need a Formal Intervention?

Formal interventions (the coordinated family confrontation model, sometimes with a professional interventionist) work for some callers, especially in situations of prolonged denial or refusal to engage. They can also backfire if not done well. Less formal family meetings — a single trusted family member having a series of sober, calm conversations — often work better for first-episode callers. Placement advisors can discuss the range of approaches and make referrals to licensed interventionists when appropriate.

When the Loved One Says No

Most callers don't go to rehab on the first conversation. Second, third, fifth conversations often do work. What helps: staying in relationship without enabling (support the person, not the use), being specific about what you will and won't do (drive to treatment: yes; pay for more substances: no), and staying in the conversation over weeks and months rather than issuing ultimatums. What hurts: shame, threats not backed up with action, hiding the problem from the rest of the family, waiting for rock bottom (which doesn't exist for many callers — they die instead).

How Family Can Actually Help with Placement

Have the caller's insurance card ready when the conversation happens. Know their date of birth and full legal name. Make the first call to (213) 600-5512 yourself if the caller gives consent — placement advisors can verify insurance and identify options before the caller commits. Offer to drive them to admission or coordinate transportation. Reach out to the caller's employer about FMLA if they work and are willing to use job-protected leave. Family plays a crucial role, especially in the first 72 hours.

Family Therapy During Rehab

Most licensed residential programs in the New Beginnings network include family therapy sessions starting around week 2 of the caller's stay. This is separate from the caller's individual therapy and addresses the family system's role in recovery and relapse prevention. Insurance typically covers family therapy during the caller's inpatient episode. Al-Anon and family-focused SMART Recovery meetings are free community resources for family members regardless of whether the caller is in treatment.

Caring for Yourself

Supporting someone in active addiction is exhausting and isolating. Al-Anon (for family of alcoholics), Nar-Anon (for family of drug users), and family-focused therapy are resources for you, not just for the person using. SAMHSA's national helpline at 1-800-662-4357 has family resource referrals. The California Peer-Run Warm Line at 1-855-845-7415 offers non-crisis emotional support.